Thank God for Limits

Some barriers are blessings.

Ben Christenson was far more miserable when he was single and childfree. He writes, “I worried about how to properly enjoy my Saturdays, how to optimize my morning routine, and of course, I worried about why I wasn’t happier.”

Now, with three young kids, he says, “I don’t have time for any of that nonsense!”

Many constraints come with having children. They wreck your sleep, your travel plans, your disposable income.

But Christenson describes his life as a parent as free: “Free from the loneliness of an empty home. Free from neurotic navel-gazing. Free from the ennui of a comfortably numb life.”

We often treat constraints as the enemy, but they are exactly what break us open. Committing ourselves to someone or something means giving up free time. But that responsibility stretches you into someone bigger than the person who had all those empty hours to spend worrying about himself.

As Timothy Keller said, “Freedom is not the absence of limitations and constraints but it is finding the right ones.”

The right limits don’t cost you a self. They build one.