Safe or Strong?

The safe path may not always be so safe in the long run.

When Jonathan Haidt was promoting his book The Coddling of the American Mind, he would often ask those over the age of 40 when they were first allowed to do something without a parent's supervision. He gave examples such as walking to a friend's house or going to the park. Those over 40 often said that this began between the ages of 6 and 8. 

Haidt asked the same question to those under the age of 25. He got entirely different responses. Members of Gen Z often said that they were not allowed to do something unsupervised until they were 12, 14, or even 16 years old. 

The crime rate plummeted in the United States in the 1990s, though there was a perception that crime was worse than ever. More protective parenting styles became common. 

Supervising kids may have kept them safe — for a while — but prevented them from developing the independence that would be invaluable later. 

When we never get "inoculated" by having to figure minor things out on our own, we may lack the strength to deal with weightier matters when there's no longer a parent around to help us.

If we aim for resilience in the near term, we're also going to be safer in the long term.